【Chat】Fatal Whisper---a short story i wrote

[小SO〃 10]

this is a short story i wrote

it' s not that good because it' s the first time that i tried to write it

if there' s any problem, please give me some comments

i' m glad to have your advise : )

hope you'll like it:)

Fatal Whisper

Sonia Chen

In that dead of night, she made that mistake again, that irrecoverable mistake.

Celia, my older sister, had much affection for me. She blessed and protected me as if I had been her lover, comforted me as if I had been her baby, and held me tight as if I had been her everything. Celia discontinued schooling because of me, so I always told her what happened to me at school in order to compensate her for her lost chance. We shared many things with each other, such as what we thought, what we did, or where we went.

One day, we chatted as usual, but I talked to Celia with fury. I stated the reason why I was so angry.

“Cheryl! Don't you know the sun rises in the east?”said Mrs. Smith.

“Yes..., ma' am?”I replied with doubt.

“Then why don't you know that Aachen is a city in Germany?”

“But...”

“No excuse, lady. You're kept in school but placed under surveillance.”

Marcia Smith, my geography teacher, always picked on me. She asked me a lot of strange and difficult questions all the time, and she would punish me whether I answered correctly or not.

Hearing my story, Celia's face turned red, and became very angry. I had never seen her as angry as at that time. And then she comforted me as usual. Though I felt something wrong with her, I let it go at that.

One day, when I got to school, someone said that Mrs. Smith was disappearing. At first I did not believe it; however, she was never seen again since that day.

To tell the truth, I was pretty happy that I could live tranquil days without that hateful old hag. I talked to Celia about this good news that made me joyful.

“You know what, Celia? That old Smith has been gone for three weeks! Because of her disappearance, everything goes so well.”

“I am so glad that you smile again,” said Celia.

“By the way, what do you think might have happened to her?” I asked Celia for entertainment.

“Maybe...she just wants to take a rest, a long, long rest,” Celia smiled deeply.

On my school days, I spent most of my time with Agnes, the best friend in my lifetime. We laughed together, yelled together, and cried together. Though Celia was also nice to me, Agnes played a more important role than Celia did. However, whenever I mention Agnes to Celia, she turned fierce and impatient. No matter what I said, she refused to listen.

On Agnes's birthday, I attended her birthday party, and Celia went with me, too. There was a party. Agnes and I put on a show, and we played two lovers. At the end of the show, we kissed and embraced tightly. At that moment, I could feel someone glaring at us with indignation. On our way home, Celia did not say a word, even though I tried to cheer her up.

The next day, Agnes was absent. I was worried about her, so I made a phone call to her.

“Hello.”

“Hello, this is Cheryl, Agnes's classmate. Is Agnes home? She's absent today.”

“Sorry... I don't know where she is either,” sobbed Agnes's mother, “I really did see her sleeping in her bed last night, but she was not in her room this morning....” Then she cried out loudly.

Where would she go? Agnes wasn't the person that would hang out during school time. I did not concentrate on classes but looked out of the window all day. The only thing on my mind was the question why Agnes disappeared.

When I got home, I told Celia this bad news, but I found something strange.

“Oh, Celia, it is too terrible!”

“What's wrong? Got sick?” she looked very anxious.

“No... Agnes did not come to school today, and her mom doesn't know where she has gone, either. She's vanished.”

“Don't worry about it, dear. Maybe she is going to give you a surprise,” Celia said casually, “or maybe she just wants to stay away from you.”

“Why does she do so? We are best friends. She has no reason to do that to me!” I became confused.

“That's hard to say. She looks on your friendship as great pressure,” she had a sinister smile.

“No..., no...” I could not help but cry. Then she comforted me as usual; however, I smelled something that was familiar to me.

After that day, I had not seen Agnes again. Time passed, and Agnes faded from my memory gradually.

Twelve years passed, and I became a freshman. One day, when I was in Celia's room, I smelled something familiar again. I tried hard to recall what this smell was. Suddenly, I found something on the floor; it was the necklace that I gave Agnes for her birthday present. There it was! The smell was from the perfume that Mrs. Smith used to wear.

Incidentally, I found a closet placed in the corner. It looked very old and dark. As I came near it, I heard someone calling me. However, there was no one but me in the room. I opened the door, and screamed. What I saw were two decayed bodies. Though it was hard to figure out who they are, my intuition made me recall the two vanished people.

“What are you doing here?” a voice came from the back. I looked over my shoulder. It was Celia.

“Celia, this...”

“Yes, here they are, the two people that you are looking for,” said Celia.

“But..., how come...?” I was scared.

“One is for you, and the other is for me,” she said, “that Smith, who you hated, made you angry.”

“That's it?” I said.

“Yes, that's it.”

“But that's not a good reason to kill people.” I started to cry.

“No matter what I have to do, I will make you happy.” Celia said seriously.

“Agnes...,” I sobbed.

“She kissed you!” Celia became angry, “she KISSED you!”

“But we are friends.”

“So what?” yelled Celia, “I do not allow other people to touch you!”

“Why are you so...?” I cried loudly.

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!” she said seriously.

“I love you too, but...”

“The love of a lover, not of a sibling,” she said.

I was shocked, completely shocked. I would never find out that MY SISTER loved me. I considered Celia to be my sister; nevertheless, she considered me to be her lover.

After that, I fled from her, and settled with my boyfriend, Edmond. Not to be seen by Celia, Edmond and I moved to another city. However, it was all in vain. Today we two bumped into Celia on a road, and I was holding his hands at that time.

Now, Edmond vanished.

She killed the one close to me again.

END

[damoko 10]

What really terrifies me is the scent lasting for 12 years. Apart from that, a nice story. 6/10 for effort.

[小SO〃 10]

What really terrifies me is the scent lasting for 12 years. Apart from that, a nice story. 6/10 for effort.

thanks for your reading:)

actually, this story also makes me a little scared...

how horrible will it be if there' s a person like Celia?

i' ll keep on trying to have more interesting stories

thanks for your reading again:)

[囧rz=3 10]

Freaky. A few grammar mistakes, otherwise good. What I fail to understand is how she managed to drag two bodies into her room without anyone noticing? Doesn't it... smell?

[采寧 10]

a scary story 0 0,

frighten me...

[I like it 10]

There's some grammar mistakes...and kinda scary :p

But great idea ;) keep on ur effort